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Even better than Nev's "better than all the rest" Fantasy League Knock-One-Out Cup

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Obi Wan, Feb 19, 2015.

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  1. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace

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    Well, it's here ROUND 2 of the Premier Fantasy Football League Knock-One-Out Cup Competition.

    For all those who have bombed out of the Nev's FA Cup predictions, are languishing behind in the Prediction League, have even less hope than Less Hope Than Neville in the Fantasy Football League AND been found wanting in the HEADLINE COMPETITION, then maybe, just maybe, this is your chance to redeem yourself.

    Of course, you have to be in the Fantasy League AND have survived round 1 of the Cup, but that's just minor detail. As a reminder, this is the stage when the league 'no-hopers' are introduced, having seen some of the big boys knocked out already.

    Here's how ROUND 1 finished:
    Lets All Go Rolando 52 v 55 Lads on Toure
    Feral Rovers
    49 v 44 Optoonistic
    'merica 31 v 49 BenArfasJigglyMoobs
    EnnyoueffseeXI 31 v 70 Nouveauchateau Utd
    ToonArmyBills 65 v 72 Lightning Heeds
    Tash's Tashingtons 37 v 39 Ah divvent knaa
    Hot Shots Pardew
    51 v 49 Stop Getting injured
    Useless underdogs 62 v 52 Inter Theirsister
    Super Mega Criminal 60 v 27 Siems Like Magic
    Peacock's Ponytail 32 v 62 Zeppelin FC
    Bradley Boys Utd Bye
    Knobby's Knackas 2 Bye
    Fenwick's Window XI Bye
    Right FC Bye
    The Sith Lords Bye
    Crystal Phallus Bye


    ROUND 2 draw about to take place now...



    Note: due to certain other competitions having been severely compromised by a lack of integrity from the 'gamesmasters' involved, I hereby swear an oath to keep this competition fair, honest and just, with totally open and transparent scoring and clear communication to all involved. Any attempts to influence the Gamsemaster (me) will NOT be tolerated. Bribes will NOT be accepted. JPF 'special (needs) rules' will NOT be applied.




    Note: The Gamesmaster reserves the right to alter the above terms and conditions at any time and any complaints will be ignored. Nay, any complaints will be considered very unfavourably against the protester.
     
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  2. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace

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    ROUND 2 DRAW:

    Hot Shots Pardew v Lads on Toure
    Feral Rovers v Zeppelin FC
    Super Mega Criminal v Useless underdogs
    Knobby's Knackas 2 v Nouveauchateau Utd
    The Sith Lords v Fenwick's Window XI
    BenArfasJigglyMoobs v Ah divvent knaa
    Right FC v Crystal Phallus
    Lightning Heeds v Bradley Boys Utd
     
    #2
  3. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace

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    Further inspections shows that some of the above team names have been changed since ROUND 1. This will not be tolerated!

    A penalty deduction may be applied due to the extra aggro for the Gamesmaster having to assess which old team name is which new team name. You have been warned <cough> Heed & Nev <cough>. Once I have had the time to work out who the perpetrators are <cough> Heed & Nev <cough> I will provide the individuals <cough> Heed & Nev <cough> with a formal warning and will decide upon the full extent of their punishment via independent tribunal.
     
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  4. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    Well said that man. Exactly what this country needs. Standards. And, in particular, the Game Master's standards.<applause>
     
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  5. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace

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    Thanks Trev. <ok>

    As a true upstanding, well respected and very experienced Games Master of the highest order, do you have any advice on how I should handle those who have attempted to cheat by changing their team user names in a sorry (and badly failed) attempt to confuse me? How severe should punishment be and do you have any examples of how this might be applied? I know they are first-time offenders (in this game at least) but I don't want to be seen as a pushover. I feel I need to stamp my mark, or else be ridiculed and abused as the Games Master who had no balls.

    Many thanks for your help and advice Trev. <ok>
     
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  6. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    At least this competition is being run fairly Obi - unlike that pathetic headline game that I am currently boycotting due to the unfair imposition of a totally undeserved yellow card.

    Can I suggest that instead of punishing myself and Heed for our name changes you should actually give us a points bonus for introducing an element of intrigue into a competition that had, up until this point, been totally outshone in the national press by the impressive 'The Official 'Better Than All The Rest' FA Cup Prediction Game'. Perhaps in the circumstances, it may even be fairer to give us both a bye all the way to the final to make up for the disgraceful way that we have both been treated treated by Trev in that other 'so-called' competition.
     
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  7. Warmir Pouchov

    Warmir Pouchov Better than JPF

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    If you don't punish Nev and HEED, its a sign of weakness Obi. You will never earn the respect of your peers, and these two will never fall into line. You have an opportunity here to carry out an act for the greater good. I implore you to take firm action and show yourself to be the leader of men and jedi the rest of us believe you can be.

    #off with their cocks
     
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  8. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    Yeah Yeah

    #atleastwe'vegotone
     
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  9. Warmir Pouchov

    Warmir Pouchov Better than JPF

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    fixed :emoticon-0148-yes:

    Do the right thing Obi :emoticon-0170-ninja
     
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  10. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    Can't argue with that!
     
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  11. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    I see Less Than is making efforts here as well to bring this game into disrepute as well. Disgraceful behaviour and should not be tolerated.

    As for action to take you could consider banning him from wearing that pink dress at weekends that I know he likes. I'm watching Less Than, don't you worry about that. Although I would suggest a longer dress as the mini dress doesn't suit you.

    Alternatively, I think a spell in your dungeon might just knock the smile off his face.

    What is clear is that he tries to ingratiate himself in with the Game Master ( he tried it with me but the injunction has been effective since I obtained it) and then spits his dummy out (literally) when that doesn't work. Firm and definite action is required.
     
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  12. Warmir Pouchov

    Warmir Pouchov Better than JPF

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    There you have it Obi. Testimony from the 2 most honorable men on this forum (me and Trev), against a cross dressing sycophant like Nev.
     
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  13. Heed

    Heed well known cheat

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    Being total innocent of any wrongdoing I agree 100% with Nev.

    We have introduced a dimension to the game that is sadly missing.

    Intrigue.

    We deserve bonus points for bringing the game to life, not penalised for being proactive.

    I would go as far as to say we should receive a 'Bye' into the next round, should it ever happen.

    Neither of us are confirmed cheats, unlike some others that could be named and shamed.
     
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  14. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace

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    Hmmm some good advice here and plenty of food for thought. Thanks gentlemen - and Nev.

    It's like a plot from Game of Thrones meets House of Cards. <laugh>
     
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  15. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    Says Obi sitting on his throne in Gamesmaster's Landing
     
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  16. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace

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    I hope you are looking forward to your spell in JPF'S Dreadfort, Reek. ;)
     
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  17. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    :emoticon-0107-sweat .
     
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  18. Warmir Pouchov

    Warmir Pouchov Better than JPF

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    <laugh><laugh><laugh><laugh>
     
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  19. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    His iron maiden was a novel modern twist on torture.
    The spikes are replaced by multiple dildos.
    He acted all Hugh Laurie in his Blackadder dungeon days.. although switched his fake German for a fake Mackem accent and then tried to waterboard me with blue pop and cheesy chips.

     
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  20. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace

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    I think BG and Trev havd provided some sound advice here. Upon reading HEED'S post again, I am not happy with his tone at all.

     
    #20
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