Off Topic Hull Daily Fail fails again

Pissed myself at this one.

Mate of a lad I work with got a bit merry and decided to ring the Hull Daily Mail news desk with a made up bullshit story.

Soft ****s only went and reported it.

Apparently made radio humberside too.

Story follows...

Dog walker's shock as he sees 'knee-high' beast in Pearson Park

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'SCARY': Billy Seniour in Pearson Park, west Hull, where he says he spotted a wild boar. Pictures: Peter Harbour
IT IS hardly Belgium's sprawling Ardennes forest, but a dog walker is convinced he spotted a wild boar rooting through undergrowth in a Hull park.

Billy Seniour says he saw the "knee-height" beast emerge from vegetation in the outer perimeter of Pearson.

The sighting was made at 8.15am, opposite the police station in Park Road.

Mr Seniour, of Duesbery Street, west Hull, said: "It looked like a wild boar to me. It was about knee height – bigger than my one-year-old St Bernard.

"It was bewildering. Shocking really. You don't expect to see a wild boar when you're in the local park walking your dog, do you?"

Mr Seniour said he and his dog were more afraid of the creature than the other way around.

"It was pretty scary to be honest," he said. "We ran off."

Joanne Danville, of Newland Avenue, west Hull, was walking her Staffordshire bull terrier in the park about an hour after the sighting.

She said: "I've not seen it, but if it's true and a boar is on the loose in Pearson Park, it's pretty scary, isn't it?

"Boars can be pretty aggressive. It might be dangerous to small children or pets. I hope it doesn't hurt itself either."

The Mail spoke to the park's wildlife ranger, Emma Garwell, who said she would not be surprised if the sighting turned out to be accurate, although it was the first report she had received.

She said a number of unusual pets, including snakes, bearded dragons and lizards had been dumped at the park over the past few years.

According to the Department for Environment Food and Rural Affairs (Defra), wild boar were a native species of Britain up to the 17th century.

In October 1998, Defra revealed the results of a study that confirmed the presence of free-living populations of wild boar in Kent, East Sussex and Dorset.

Captive wild boar, which are included in the Dangerous Wild Animals Act 1976, are kept in private or public wildlife collections, in zoos and on farms.

Mrs Garwell advises any park visitor who spots an unusual creature to call Hull City Council on 01482 300300.

Out-of-place animals

It would not be the first time an animal has been seen out of place in Hull.

Last month, the Mail reported on Elsa, the 4ft python, who is still believed to be on the loose after escaping from her home in Bransholme.

In the same month we told how a horse was spotted in Bude Park paddling pool, also in Bransholme, while a family of escaped pigs gave residents the runaround in Sigglesthorne, near Hornsea.

Going back further, in Edwardian Hull, large zoological gardens in the Spring Bank and Princes Avenue area were home to a number of elephants, which could be seen walking along Spring Bank every morning to be washed in the River Hull.

Read more at http://www.hulldailymail.co.uk/home#rAg21rDVT0aHcT2R.99

 

If this is the sort of thing that goes on, I'm cancelling my subscription to Fortean Times....

 

My mates in the RAF used to write to Dear Deidre in the Sun. Surprised how many were printed.

 

Good lad.

 

My girlfriend reckons a few people on Facebook said they saw something similar.

 

How thick are the HDM? It wouldn't have lasted five minutes in Pearson Park. The bears would have eaten it.

 

Fantastic. He's played a blinder here.

Got a mention on the front page...

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it's basically the old Sunday Sport for Hull folk..

 

"Cor, the whole cast of Brookside are lesbians..."

"Bloody Nora! Neil Kinnock's grandparents were homosexual martians!!!.........It's a good job I read that, I was gonna vote labour!"

"Hell's teeth! You can get AIDS from bicycling....."

 

I avoid the paper as much as possible when on iPad or phone - the pop up ads and persistent auto play videos are as bad as anywhere I've seen . Ad blocker only seems to work on comp

 

It would have been eaten, not by the bears though.

 

Only if they're quicker than the pikeys.

 

I was asked not to mention the alligator in the lake.

 

That story is a crock Dutch...

 

Was it just a tall tail?

 

The HDM would snap it up.

 

It's coming together though. Wasn't the tenfoot right to roam issue around there? They just misunderstood the original Allygater story.

 

All these animals escaping all over Pearson Park. Who was watching the Penna's...

 

I knew this was bullshit the other day when I read it because of the bit where he said he ran off

 

Some classics no doubt. You forces types can spin a good tale.

Anyone ever read the following through thread on the arrse forum? Had me in tears of laughter.

http://www.arrse.co.uk/community/threads/following-through-sport-of-kings.3375/