What's you're best joke? One of mine is ... The guy who had his house made backwards so he could watch telly.
I needed to book a checkup at the dentists so I rang them and spoke to the reception. I explained to her that I just needed a checkup. "2:30?" She asked? "No" I replied, "I just need a checkup"
PC World are a joke...... Couldn't print me a VAT invoice today, the printer wasn't working and they couldn't get it to work despite their best efforts which mainly involved hitting it progressively harder
What's the difference between Dubai & Abu Dhabi? Dubai don't watch The Flintstones but Abu Dhabi doo!
Sexual activity for older males: (where were you born?) Statistics just released from The United Nations B.O.H. Team, reveal that: British men between 55 and 70 years of age, will, on average, have sex two to three times per week, (and a small number a lot more) whereas Polish men, in exactly the same age group, will have sex only once or twice per year if they are lucky. This has come as very upsetting news to me and most of my mates, ....as none of us had any idea we were Polish. A friend of mine told me he'd been to Africa to dig a water collection facility for a village. I think he meant well. Paddy phoned the RSPCA to report he had found a dog with 5 puppies in a suitcase down on the canal, the operator says "Thats Terrible, are they moving" to which Paddy replies, "I dont know, but that would explain the suitcase"
PC world are a joke, I applied for a job there, got turned down, apparently they only employ black disabled lesbians
The funniest thing I ever saw was when me and my Nephew went to Scotland on a shop fitting job, We were waiting on this road with some portable Traffics lights. The sign next to them said " when red light shows,wait here" This young lass walked up the path next to Them and stopped, we were pissing ourselfs, I took a pic, she started walking when they Turned to green..ha ha ha I couldnt breath...