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Off Topic The More Intellectual Gag Thread

Discussion in 'Hull City' started by Mr Hatem, May 9, 2017.

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  1. Mr Hatem

    Mr Hatem Well-Known Member

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    Who invented King Arthur's Round Table?

    Sir Cumference
     
    #41
    Mr Hatem, May 9, 2017
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  2. Jimmy Graham's bald head

    Jimmy Graham's bald head Well-Known Member

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    The bartender says, “We don’t serve time travelers in here.”


    A time traveler walks into a bar
     
    #42
    Jimmy Graham's bald head, May 9, 2017
    dennisboothstash, tigerincanada, Stockholm Tiger and 3 others like this.
  3. Mr Hatem

    Mr Hatem Well-Known Member

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    La Piscina Es Honda
    '
    ;
    ;
    ;
    ;
    ;
    ;
    ;
    ;
    ;

    El Mar Es Toyota
     
    #43
    Mr Hatem, May 9, 2017
  4. Arnold_Lane_HCFC_

    Arnold_Lane_HCFC_ Well-Known Member

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    And not forgetting : Chinese man with holes in trouser pocket, feels very cocky.
     
    #44
    Arnold_Lane_HCFC_, May 9, 2017
    Mr Hatem likes this.
  5. Mr Hatem

    Mr Hatem Well-Known Member

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    potassium nitrogen oxygen carbon potassium erbium sulfur = boron oxygen oxygen boron sulfur
     
    #45
    Mr Hatem, May 9, 2017
  6. Arnold_Lane_HCFC_

    Arnold_Lane_HCFC_ Well-Known Member

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    Often said if you have to explain your own jokes, they're not that funny.

    Can you explain this one, I don't get it?
     
    #46
    Arnold_Lane_HCFC_, May 9, 2017
  7. Evington

    Evington Well-Known Member

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    Sorry it wasn't a joke. It was an observation that this thread will get a good number of responses.
     
    #47
    Evington, May 9, 2017
  8. tigerscanada

    tigerscanada Well-Known Member

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    Q. If a centipede a bucketful, how much would a precipice ?
    A. A sheer drop.
     
    #48
    tigerscanada, May 9, 2017
  9. Arnold_Lane_HCFC_

    Arnold_Lane_HCFC_ Well-Known Member

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    Went to York at the weekend, and asked one of the locals if there was a B&Q in York?

    No, but there is a Y ,an O, an R and a K.
     
    #49
    Arnold_Lane_HCFC_, May 9, 2017
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  10. Arnold_Lane_HCFC_

    Arnold_Lane_HCFC_ Well-Known Member

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    Ahem. Still don't get it.
     
    #50
    Arnold_Lane_HCFC_, May 9, 2017
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  11. kirkellatiger

    kirkellatiger Well-Known Member

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    Why is there no medicine in the jungle?

    ...because the parrots-eat-em-all
     
    #51
    kirkellatiger, May 9, 2017
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  12. Mr Hatem

    Mr Hatem Well-Known Member

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    I need some acetylsalicylic acid after that one.
     
    #52
    Mr Hatem, May 9, 2017
  13. jacksdad

    jacksdad Active Member

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    I went on a blind date with a girl called simile. I don't know what I metaphor.
     
    #53
    jacksdad, May 9, 2017
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  14. TIGERSCAVE

    TIGERSCAVE Well-Known Member

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    How easy is it to count in binary? It’s as easy as 01 10 11.
     
    #54
    TIGERSCAVE, May 9, 2017
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  15. Mr Hatem

    Mr Hatem Well-Known Member

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    particle store.png
     
    #55
    Mr Hatem, May 9, 2017
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  16. Mr Hatem

    Mr Hatem Well-Known Member

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    moron.jpg
     
    #56
    Mr Hatem, May 9, 2017
  17. Mr Hatem

    Mr Hatem Well-Known Member

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    sticker blue.jpg
     
    #57
    Mr Hatem, May 9, 2017
  18. Mr Hatem

    Mr Hatem Well-Known Member

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    cartoon gravity.jpg
     
    #58
    Mr Hatem, May 9, 2017
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  19. Edelman

    Edelman Well-Known Member

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    I said my our lass the other day do you know where Helsinki is.???
    She replied!!!! Is it where the devil does the dishes.
     
    #59
    Edelman, May 9, 2017
  20. SimonGraysJacket

    SimonGraysJacket Well-Known Member

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    A man walks into a pub, sits down at the bar, and orders a drink. The landlord gives him his drink, accompanied by a dish of peanuts.
    To his surprise, a voice comes from the peanut dish. "You look great tonight!" it said. "You really look fantastic... And that aftershave is just wonderful!"

    The man is obviously a little confused, but tries to ignore it.

    Realising he has no ciggies he wanders over to the cigarette machine. After inserting his money, another voice emits from the machine. "You BASTARD... Oh my god you STINK... Do you know, you're almost as ugly as your mother."

    By now, the man is extremely perplexed. He turns to the landlord for an explanation.

    "Ah yes sir," the landlord responds, "The peanuts are complimentary, but the cigarette machine is out of order."
     
    #60
    SimonGraysJacket, May 9, 2017
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