1. Log in now to remove adverts - no adverts at all to registered members!

Off Topic Just for Mr RAWhite

Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by Smug in Boots, Jan 19, 2015.

  1. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    18,540
    Likes Received:
    42,617
    Advice please:

    Can male ejaculate travel more than 2 metres? Only I'm meeting my girlfriend up the park and I don't want her to get pregnant.
     
    #5641
    Gordon Armstrong and MrRAWhite like this.
  2. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    18,540
    Likes Received:
    42,617
  3. Vincemac

    Vincemac Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    16,935
    Likes Received:
    12,968
    At a girl's college dormitory, dates were permitted only on Saturday night:

    One young man showed up on a Tuesday evening, explaining to an older woman in the lobby of the dorm that it was imperative he see a certain young lady immediately.

    "I want to surprise her. You see, I'm her brother."

    "Oh, she'll be surprised all right." Said the woman. "But not as surprised as I am ! I'm her mother!"
     
    #5643
  4. Vincemac

    Vincemac Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    16,935
    Likes Received:
    12,968
    How old were you when you discovered that Axl Rose from Guns & Roses was an anagram of Oral Sex?
     
    #5644
  5. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    18,540
    Likes Received:
    42,617
    A few minutes ago when I read your post.
     
    #5645
  6. Chunksafc

    Chunksafc Guest

    Glad it wasn't just me
     
    #5646
  7. gelders pie

    gelders pie Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2011
    Messages:
    4,712
    Likes Received:
    8,830
    Me too
     
    #5647
  8. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    26,980
    Likes Received:
    14,258
    please log in to view this image
     
    #5648
  9. Ozzymac

    Ozzymac Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2019
    Messages:
    4,689
    Likes Received:
    10,939
    please log in to view this image
     
    #5649
  10. Evil Jimmy Krankie

    Evil Jimmy Krankie Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2019
    Messages:
    1,591
    Likes Received:
    3,582
    I was and still am 53 when I discovered that fact approximately one minute ago.

    Another question. How old were you when you discovered that Gok Wan of How To Look Good Naked and other equally dire television fashion shows was an anagram of go ****?

    Or that Donald Trump is an anagram of Fake tanned ****spangle.
     
    #5650
    Ozzymac, RTB, Montysoptician and 3 others like this.

  11. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    18,540
    Likes Received:
    42,617
    One of London's leading care centres will soon be re- carec.jpeg opening
     
    #5651
  12. Perritts Parrot

    Perritts Parrot Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 7, 2020
    Messages:
    266
    Likes Received:
    420
    62 and 3 weeks.
     
    #5652
    Vincemac and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  13. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2011
    Messages:
    21,986
    Likes Received:
    87,571
    To the person who stole my train set . . . . what goes around, comes around.
     
    #5653
  14. Deletion Requested1

    Deletion Requested1 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2011
    Messages:
    5,226
    Likes Received:
    3,624
    Depends how long you have been apart and whether or not you are deeply religious
     
    #5654
    MrRAWhite and Gil T Azell like this.
  15. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    18,540
    Likes Received:
    42,617
    A Golfer was involved in a terrible car crash and was rushed to hospital.
    Just before he was put under, the Surgeon popped in to see him.
    "I have some good news and some bad news."
    The Surgeon tells him.
    "The bad news is that I have to remove your right arm!"
    “Oh God no," the man cries.
    "My Golfing is over.
    Please Doc, what's the good news?"
    "The good news is, I have another one to replace it with, but it's a woman's arm and I'll need your permission before go ahead with the transplant."
    "Go for it Doc, as long as I can play Golf again."
    The operation went well and a year later the man was out on the Golf Course when he bumped into the Surgeon.
    "Hi, how's the new arm?" The surgeon asks.
    "Just great," the Golfer replies.
    "I'm playing the best Golf of my life.
    My new arm has a much finer touch and my Putting has really improved."
    “That's great."
    "Not only that, My handwriting has improved, learned how to sew my own clothes and even taken up painting landscapes in watercolors."
    "That’s unbelievable, I'm glad to hear the transplant was such a great success.
    Are you having any side effects?"
    "Well, just two really," the Golfer told him.
    "I have trouble Parallel Parking and every time have an erection get a headache!"
     
    #5655
    MrRAWhite, Vincemac, mrs em and 3 others like this.
  16. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2011
    Messages:
    21,986
    Likes Received:
    87,571
    When I die I want to be buried with all of my records.

    It will be my vinyl resting place!
     
    #5656
  17. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2011
    Messages:
    21,986
    Likes Received:
    87,571
  18. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2011
    Messages:
    21,986
    Likes Received:
    87,571
  19. Brainman

    Brainman Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2019
    Messages:
    1,402
    Likes Received:
    5,836
    #5659
    MrRAWhite and Ozzymac like this.
  20. gelders pie

    gelders pie Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2011
    Messages:
    4,712
    Likes Received:
    8,830
    Before his funeral , Yasser Arafat’s wife went to see him . Why is he dressed in a striped black and white shirt with a no 8 on it ? she asked. Well Mrs Arafat , it was his dying wish to be buried in his beloved Gaza strip
     
    #5660
    MrRAWhite and Gil T Azell like this.

Users Who Are Viewing This Thread (Users: 2, Guests: 0)

  1. Mr_B
  2. OldArgus

Share This Page