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Jokes

Discussion in 'Leeds United' started by ellandback, Jun 25, 2019.

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  1. brisbane-lion

    brisbane-lion Well-Known Member

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    #461
    brisbane-lion, May 30, 2020
    Eireleeds1 likes this.
  2. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    We both know it could’ve been a lot worse eh brissy
     
    #462
    Eireleeds1, May 30, 2020
  3. Eric Le Merde

    Eric Le Merde Well-Known Member

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    Cummings gets about a bit!!!! He was at last nights Rugby match in Sydney

    Screen Shot 2020-05-30 at 5.47.39 pm.png
     
    #463
    Eric Le Merde, May 30, 2020
    ellandback, wakeybreakyheart and Eireleeds1 like this.
  4. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    Are you sure that’s a cutout. Hard to tell the difference
     
    #464
    Eireleeds1, May 30, 2020
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  5. milkyboy

    milkyboy Well-Known Member

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    He’s worried that the fall out of the scandal will effect his family in this country, as any parent would... and child care is excellent in Australia. Also there are no complicated lockdown rules for him to get confused about.

    I think you should get the real one and leave us with the cardboard cutout Eric. How long do you think it would take boris to notice? ‘I say, bit quiet today Dom’
     
    #465
    milkyboy, May 30, 2020
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  6. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    C7AA8093-5BD7-4833-ADE5-624AAADA8D3E.jpeg
     
    #466
    Eireleeds1, May 30, 2020
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  7. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    11C739E4-E142-4552-A2ED-E6C04234C68B.jpeg
     
    #467
    Eireleeds1, May 30, 2020
    wakeybreakyheart, Farsleyexile, ellandback and 1 other person like this.
  8. brisbane-lion

    brisbane-lion Well-Known Member

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    Mmmmm......?
     
    #468
    brisbane-lion, May 31, 2020
  9. Eric Le Merde

    Eric Le Merde Well-Known Member

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    101235439_2485716088407412_4759433958561677312_n.jpg
     
    #469
    Eric Le Merde, May 31, 2020
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  10. wakeybreakyheart

    wakeybreakyheart Well-Known Member

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    #470
    wakeybreakyheart, May 31, 2020
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  11. wakeybreakyheart

    wakeybreakyheart Well-Known Member

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    #471
    wakeybreakyheart, May 31, 2020
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  12. brisbane-lion

    brisbane-lion Well-Known Member

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    Did you make that up? Are you a dad? Sounds like one of their jokes. <laugh><laugh><laugh>
     
    #472
    brisbane-lion, May 31, 2020
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  13. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    You crosses my mind when I saw it first <laugh>
     
    #473
    Eireleeds1, May 31, 2020
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  14. Whitejock

    Whitejock Well-Known Member

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    Topical joke ....

    please log in to view this image
     
    #474
    Whitejock, Jun 7, 2020
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  15. ellandback

    ellandback Well-Known Member
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    "Is that the Ballycashel Echo?" asks Mick.

    "How much would it be to put an ad in your paper?"

    "Five pounds an inch," a woman replies. "Why? What are you selling?"

    "A ten-foot ladder," said Mick before slamming the phone down.
     
    #475
    ellandback, Jun 7, 2020
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  16. ellandback

    ellandback Well-Known Member
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    A sobbing Ms Murphy approaches Fr O’Grady after mass.

    He says: “So what’s bothering you?”

    She replies: “Oh, Father, I’ve terrible news. My husband passed away last night.”

    The priest says: “Oh, Mary, that’s terrible. Did he have any last requests?”

    "Certainly father," she replied. “He said: “Please Mary, put down that damn gun.”
     
    #476
    ellandback, Jun 7, 2020
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  17. ellandback

    ellandback Well-Known Member
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    An Irishman is struggling to find a parking space.

    "Lord," he prayed. "I can't stand this. If you open a space up for me, I swear I'll give up the Guinness and go to mass every Sunday."

    Suddenly, the clouds part and the sun shines on an empty parking spot. Without hesitation, the Irishman says: "Never mind, I found one!"
     
    #477
    ellandback, Jun 7, 2020
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  18. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    An assistant to Donald Trump told him she had a fantastic dream last night. There was a huge parade down Pennsylvania Avenue celebrating Trump.
    Millions lined the parade route, cheering when the President went past. Bands were playing; children were throwing confetti into the air; there were balloons everywhere.
    It was absolutely the BIGGEST CELEBRATION WASHINGTON HAD EVER SEEN!!!

    Trump was very impressed and said, "That's really great!
    By the way, how did I look in your dream? Was my hair okay?"
    His assistant said, … “I couldn’t tell, the coffin was closed."!!!
     
    #478
    Eireleeds1, Jun 7, 2020
    Farsleyexile, ellandback, Gessa and 1 other person like this.
  19. Old Git

    Old Git Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #479
    Old Git, Jun 8, 2020
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  20. old sea dog

    old sea dog Active Member

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    #480
    old sea dog, Jun 8, 2020
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