1. Log in now to remove adverts - no adverts at all to registered members!

Off Topic The Goodhand Arms

Discussion in 'Southampton' started by TheSecondStain, Jul 15, 2014.

Page 2319 of 2658
  1. ChilcoSaint

    ChilcoSaint What a disgrace
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2011
    Messages:
    37,345
    Likes Received:
    35,267
    I thought long and hard about which thread to post this on, and settled on this one. Please find time to watch this very powerful and moving account of how racism has affected 2 very well-known cricketers. It was shown on Sky Cricket a couple of times yesterday during rain breaks. Well done Sky for making this film.
     
    #46361
    ChilcoSaint, Jul 9, 2020
    saintrichie123, tomw24, Schrodinger's Cat and 2 others like this.
  2. fatletiss

    fatletiss Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 17, 2011
    Messages:
    57,300
    Likes Received:
    40,066
    The nurse at the sperm bank asked me if I’d like to masturbate in the cup. I said, “Well, I’m pretty good, but I don’t think I’m ready to compete just yet.













    I’m sure some will think I am good enough!!
     
    #46362
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 10, 2020
    fatletiss, Jul 10, 2020
    Schrodinger's Cat, Archers Road, San Tejón and 4 others like this.
  3. SaintMarv

    SaintMarv Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 12, 2011
    Messages:
    2,778
    Likes Received:
    4,271
    A man skinny as a rake dressed as a cowboy came up to me and said have you got a couple of quid so I can get something to eat? I said sorry mate I don't carry cash but if you go to the end of the high street there is a bacon tree. A little bit later I saw the guy again with lots of arrows in him. You rotten b*stard he said. It wasn't a bacon tree it was an ambush
     
    #46363
    SaintMarv, Jul 10, 2020
    Schrodinger's Cat, ......loading......, Archers Road and 2 others like this.
  4. SaintMarv

    SaintMarv Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 12, 2011
    Messages:
    2,778
    Likes Received:
    4,271
    I was in Tesco earlier and this bloke started throwing cheese at me. I said that's not mature
     
    #46364
    SaintMarv, Jul 10, 2020
    ......loading......, Archers Road, saintrichie123 and 1 other person like this.
  5. fatletiss

    fatletiss Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 17, 2011
    Messages:
    57,300
    Likes Received:
    40,066
    How dairy
     
    #46365
    fatletiss, Jul 10, 2020
    saintrichie123 and SaintMarv like this.
  6. saintrichie123

    saintrichie123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2011
    Messages:
    30,066
    Likes Received:
    34,755
    C5E50EB0-C39C-46EC-8EEE-72D3244AB703.jpeg
     
    #46366
    saintrichie123, Jul 10, 2020
    StJabbo1, San Tejón and SaintMarv like this.
  7. fatletiss

    fatletiss Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 17, 2011
    Messages:
    57,300
    Likes Received:
    40,066
    @StJabbo1

    so... the mother in law had been on holiday a few years back to Canada and came back via New York. She came down to ours for a few days and was telling us about her trip over dinner. It was a very long and detailed story about her trip

    you can imagine how interested I was!!

    I think she realised I was a tad glazed over in the eyes as when she got to the New York part of the trip, she threw this sentence in there:

    “Well in New York I did something I’ve never done before. I had a Brazilian” :emoticon-0104-surpr

    I had a glass of wine to my lips and literally spat the red wine over the table.

    She looked up and finished her sentence with, “I’ve never eaten Brazilian food before.”

    You had to be there really, but fair play to her, she did me like a kipper with that line. <doh>
     
    #46367
    fatletiss, Jul 10, 2020
    San Tejón, SaintMarv, fran-MLs little camera and 4 others like this.
  8. StJabbo1

    StJabbo1 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2019
    Messages:
    8,418
    Likes Received:
    10,055
    Thanks, I'll use that when the right moment comes round. Perhaps when asked what I did in the lockdown.
     
    #46368
    Last edited: Jul 10, 2020
    StJabbo1, Jul 10, 2020
    fatletiss, ChilcoSaint and davecg69 like this.
  9. davecg69

    davecg69 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2012
    Messages:
    5,759
    Likes Received:
    6,822
    Fantastic! Well done her :emoticon-0102-bigsm:emoticon-0102-bigsm
     
    #46369
    davecg69, Jul 10, 2020
  10. fatletiss

    fatletiss Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 17, 2011
    Messages:
    57,300
    Likes Received:
    40,066
    alright Dave, yes she is single!! <laugh>
     
    #46370
    fatletiss, Jul 10, 2020
    davecg69 likes this.

  11. fatletiss

    fatletiss Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 17, 2011
    Messages:
    57,300
    Likes Received:
    40,066
    A woman walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a double entendre. So he gives it to her.
     
    #46371
    fatletiss, Jul 10, 2020
    davecg69 and ChilcoSaint like this.
  12. SaintMarv

    SaintMarv Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 12, 2011
    Messages:
    2,778
    Likes Received:
    4,271
     
    #46372
    SaintMarv, Jul 10, 2020
  13. fran-MLs little camera

    fran-MLs little camera Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2011
    Messages:
    68,902
    Likes Received:
    24,141
    Dame Vera’s funeral today with Spitfire fly past and her image was projected on the Dover cliffs.
     
    #46373
    fran-MLs little camera, Jul 10, 2020
    davecg69, SaintMarv and thereisonlyoneno7 like this.
  14. Archers Road

    Archers Road Urban Spaceman

    Joined:
    Jun 1, 2011
    Messages:
    53,940
    Likes Received:
    58,525

    Were there bluebells?
     
    #46374
    Archers Road, Jul 10, 2020
  15. ChilcoSaint

    ChilcoSaint What a disgrace
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2011
    Messages:
    37,345
    Likes Received:
    35,267
    Or even bluebirds...
     
    #46375
    ChilcoSaint, Jul 10, 2020
    Archers Road likes this.
  16. Archers Road

    Archers Road Urban Spaceman

    Joined:
    Jun 1, 2011
    Messages:
    53,940
    Likes Received:
    58,525

    Them too.
     
    #46376
    Archers Road, Jul 10, 2020
    ChilcoSaint likes this.
  17. ----HistoryRepeating----

    ----HistoryRepeating---- Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2011
    Messages:
    20,950
    Likes Received:
    9,664
    El Chapo delivering food parcels to the poor is a masterstroke. Stepping in when the government stand by and do nothing. There will be an uprising, and this will be the trigger. I'm surprised they've got enough time to take a break from selling drugs, sales must be going through the roof right now.
     
    #46377
    ----HistoryRepeating----, Jul 10, 2020
  18. saintrichie123

    saintrichie123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2011
    Messages:
    30,066
    Likes Received:
    34,755
    069A3339-3BB1-4B97-93D2-2E19A0E30F32.jpeg
     
    #46378
    saintrichie123, Jul 10, 2020
    San Tejón, thereisonlyoneno7 and StJabbo1 like this.
  19. Number 1 Jasper

    Number 1 Jasper Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    24,187
    Likes Received:
    14,911
    so he gave her one ?
     
    #46379
    Number 1 Jasper, Jul 10, 2020
  20. fatletiss

    fatletiss Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 17, 2011
    Messages:
    57,300
    Likes Received:
    40,066
    This must have driven Tommy Cooper mad!
     
    #46380
    fatletiss, Jul 10, 2020
Page 2319 of 2658

Share This Page