FFS man, this isn't Liverpool. However.... For £50, I'll make sure it's still there when you get back
Ooh, ooh, an excuse for an old joke. Guy is off to watch his team play in Liverpool, and a local scally offered to mind his car for £2. "I don't need it minding" says the bloke, "I've left my rottweiler in the car". "Oh aye lah, can your rotty put out fires then?"
I went to Anfield to see City. I had a packet of sandwiches in my pocket. 'Whats that in your pocket?' the Scouse steward asked. 'My sandwiches.' 'Is that tickin?' he asked. 'No, its turkey,' I replied.