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Off Topic Just for Mr RAWhite

Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by Smug in Boots, Jan 19, 2015.

  1. Snaggey

    Snaggey Well-Known Member

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    I really hope that is real.
     
    #13561
  2. Blond Bombshell

    Blond Bombshell Well-Known Member

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    #13562
    Makemstine Roger and Draig like this.
  3. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Woman goes to the doctors and says " Doctor...I'm in agony, I've got a problem with my aviaries "

    Doctor replies " You mean ovaries "

    Women " No..I've definitely got extreme pain in my aviaries "

    Doctor " I'm sure you must mean ovaries, anyway remove your knickers and lie on the bed "

    After a thorough examination down below the doctor removes his rubber gloves and says " Well..... there appears to be be nothing to concern yourself about, however you're right about the aviaries....there's been a cockatoo up there "
     
    #13563
    Wooperts_duck, Nig, Whittylad and 6 others like this.
  4. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Murphy's' old lady had been pregnant for some time and now the time had come.

    He brought her to the doctor and the doctor began to deliver the baby.

    She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Murphy and said. 'Hey, Murph! You just had you a son,!

    'Ain't dat grand,' Murphy got excited by this, but just then the doctor spoke up and said, 'Hold on! We ain't finished yet, !'

    The doctor then delivered a little girl.

    He said, 'Hey, Murph! You got you a daughter, She is a pretty lil ting, too....'

    Murphy got kind of puzzled by this and then the doctor said, 'Hold on, we aint got done yet!'

    The doctor then delivered another boy and said, Murph, you just had yourself another boy!'

    Murphy said to the doctor, 'Doc, what caused all of dem babies,?'

    The doctor said, 'You never know Murph, it was probably something that happened during conception.'

    Murphy said, 'Ah yeah, during conception

    When Murph and his wife went home with their three children, he sat down with his wife and said,

    'Mama, you remember dat night that we ran out of Vaseline and we had to use dat dere 3-in-1 Oil.'

    She said, 'Yeah, I remember dat night...'

    Murph said, 'I'll tell you, ......it's a fek kin' good ting we didn't use WD-40.
     
    #13564
    Last edited: Jan 24, 2022
    Wooperts_duck, Nig, Draig and 5 others like this.
  5. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Someone asked me, "and now that you are retired, do you still have a job?"

    I replied, "Yes I am my wife's sexual adviser."

    "Somewhat shocked, they said "I beg your pardon, but what do you mean by that?"

    "Very simple. The wife has told me that when she wants my ****ing advice, she'll ask me. for i t."
     
    #13565
    Wooperts_duck, Nig, Draig and 4 others like this.
  6. spirit of 73

    spirit of 73 Well-Known Member

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  7. spirit of 73

    spirit of 73 Well-Known Member

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  8. spirit of 73

    spirit of 73 Well-Known Member

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  9. spirit of 73

    spirit of 73 Well-Known Member

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  10. spirit of 73

    spirit of 73 Well-Known Member

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  11. spirit of 73

    spirit of 73 Well-Known Member

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  12. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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  13. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    Fact of the week:
    In the year 2030 you will never be further than 300 yards from a former Watford manager.
     
    #13573
  14. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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  15. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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  16. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    To save money on funeral costs, we bought grandma a pet vulture.
     
    #13576
  17. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    A bloke in the pub plays in a tribute band called oc/dc . . . . after gigs they go back and tidy the hotel room.
     
    #13577
    Nig, Draig, Gil T Azell and 1 other person like this.
  18. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    I’m surrounded by vegetables in jars.
    It’s like Piccalilli circus in here.
     
    #13578
  19. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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  20. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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