O/T What weapons do you have in your house?

Right but say nowt.
I actually have a Luger & .303 bayonet that my granda brought back from the war.
A machete, cricket bat, hatchet, homemade baseball bat made out of brass that I turned myself on a lathe & a cosh made out of leather & lead shavings.

 

I'm that hard Billy, I have that for breakfast some mornings.

Seriously, the baseball bat sounds interesting ..... nice when you have something you made yersel.

I have a set of brass knuckle-dusters I made when I was 20, never ever used them but carried them ****ing miles.

 

The only weapon i have is my penis. Its small but effective, comes in a small a tube and my wife swears that the juices from it that fills her eyes, blind her as though she has been hit with pepper spray. Does that count?

 

One word. Why?

 

I'm afraid I just can't swallow that .....

 

A balloon on a stick

 

Baseball bat under the bed..

 

The chainsaw normally puts people off, as does a great big dog.

 

Only weapon I have in the house is an ak47. I don't keep ammo for it, incase the house was ever searched. I figured the weapon alone would scare anyone intruder into retreat.

Payed a fair bit of coin for it mind.

 

A mate of mine asked me to make him a priest, no not the Catholic thing but the tool you use for killing fish.
I pinched some brass bar from the factory & made the bat out of the rest of it.
It's very heavy being brass & I wouldn't like a twat on the napper with it.
I even fitted a slip strap so nee **** can pull it off me.

 

Incidentally, anybody that has a baseball or cricket bat in the house, make sure you have the ball to go with it otherwise you can get done.
Just a bit of advice.

 

I always answer the door in cricket whites and pads,just in case lol....,due to my location lots of folk here hold
a shotgun licence and most crimp their own cartridges.

 

Baseball bat, number 7 golf iron, grass hook, chainsaw, brush cutter which does 10,000 rpm and a football sock and two snooker balls.

 

With a decent array of weapons between us, we should all be followers of the Arsenal.

 

I certainly wouldn't doubt that Smug, I noticed that recently you had Comm for breakfast

 

honestly

rev a chainsaw up and any intruders will be out faster than flash himself

could also wear a mask and a bloody apron

 

.

The poor bastards would **** themselves.

 

My golf clubs are in the wardrobe. 2 iron is impossible to hit a ball with so that'd be my weapon of choice!!

 

Let's face it, chances are if I get burgled it's off a smackhead who's desperate for his next hit. I'd ****ing hit him alright, the human rizzla man would need to be very handy with whatever tool he's turned up with.

I also have an alarm which I set for downstairs and I can move around freely upstairs, if the downstairs alarm sounded and the **** still wanted to come upstairs despite how loud it is, then he's obviously fancying some, so in that event I have a Gerber under my bed and if it's a case of protecting the other people in my house, that thing is effortless.

I also have in my possession some 'Carte Blanche' kit, some of you may know what that is, I got it on a short detachment when I was in the forces, I'm keeping that to sell one day.

 

A Staffy & Japanese Akhita!