Elf’s self indulgent banter thread * (ignore if you are one of the 99% who dislike Elf’s)

Elf’s finest moment dressed as a (small) slug

 

but Elf was saying to him …. "I've bought you a pint and left it on the bar at the back of the stand... I'm just off to the loo"

 

That jacket hideous

 

The life of a Global Moderator is not an easy one...

Awoke this morning to a number of abusive overnight DMs from @Beware of the Virus.

He was stranded at Customs at Heathrow, whilst waiting for HM Customs officials to interview him about his confiscated slug green jacket.

Their concern was not so much the potential
security risk, as the bad taste on evidence in Elf’s wearing it.

 

I was under the impression that Immigration Officers at Heathrow did not allow unaccompanied children into the Country?

 

The grey hair is a giveaway. They don’t sell Grecian 2000 in Brazil.

 

I think he purchased the Slug Coat from Screwfix... they sell them as insulation for hot water tanks

 

He has a seat in the Upper West tomorrow.

A part of the stadium now well worth avoiding.

 

The walking hand grenade, like my bottom, likely to explode at any time

 

@AllHellLetLoose

Very disappointing news. @Beware of the Virus told me this morning that he has to work his bollox off for the next 9 months, to pay for Brazil.

Mrs Elf’s won’t be pleased to see that I’ve just caught him gambling in the bookies.

 

He's also got Elf's penchant for pocket billiards

 

Obviously been a good day in the shop

 

He must of had growth hormones whilst in Brazil- he can reach the counter

 

Nice coat, although a little too bright.

 

I asked to stick the bet on Mr ban Gerwen's account but they told me it was blocked due to late payment.

 

Looks like he's reading the form guide - I am 100% certain he would not understand anything on that page

 

Had us at 4-1

 

Like a gambler.............

 

A fool and his money ........

 

The fool bit is correct