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Off Topic Heres a joke for you all

Discussion in 'Queens Park Rangers' started by kiwiqpr, Feb 23, 2012.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8301
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 24, 2020
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8301
    Last edited: Jan 24, 2020
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 24, 2020
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8302
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 24, 2020
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  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8303
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 26, 2020
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  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Dave the Scouser is touring the USA. Along the way, he stops off at a remote bar in the Nevada desert and chats to the bartender when he spots a Red Indian in full tribal dress seated in the corner of the bar.

    "Blimey!" remarks Dave. "Who's he?"

    "Gee, that's the memory man," replies the bartender. "He knows everything there is to know. Got a memory like an elephant, he can remember any fact. Heck, go and try him out!"

    Dave heads over to the Red Indian, thinking that he can outsmart him with a question about English football.

    He asks the memory man, "Who won the 1965 FA cup final?"

    "Liverpool," came the instantaneous reply.

    Dave was stunned. He tried again asking, "Who did they beat?"

    "Leeds," replied the memory man.

    Dave tried once more asking, "What was the final score?"

    The wise Red Indian didn't hesitate in answering, "2-1."

    Dave thinks he'll get smart, asking the memory man for the name of the winning goal scorer. Without so much as blinking, the Red Indian says, "Ian St John."

    Dave is stunned and returns home to Liverpool, where he tells everyone about the Red Indian. Dave's curiosity lingers, and he vows to return to America and pay his respects to the Indian. Ten years later, Dave finally saved up enough money to return and, after weeks of searching the Nevada desert, once more he finds the Red Indian, now in a cave.

    Humbled by the Red Indian, Dave steps forward, bows, and greets the brave in his traditional tongue.

    "How," Dave says.

    The memory man squints at him and replies, "A diving header in the six-yard box."
     
    #8304
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 27, 2020
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8305
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 27, 2020
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8306
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 27, 2020
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8307
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 27, 2020
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  9. GroveRanger

    GroveRanger Well-Known Member

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    That must be at our local park, all it needs added is "and given spliffs" to be 100% accurate.
     
    #8308
    GroveRanger, Jan 27, 2020
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  10. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #8309
    kiwiqpr, Jan 27, 2020
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  11. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    I took my new girlfriend home to meet my parents the other day. After saying hello my Dad pulled me to one side and whispered "you could have done better than that son. She's the ugliest pig I've ever seen! She must weigh 23 stone. Covered in spots. lips like a cod, shes got a beard, shes cross eyed, got a bald head, size 15 feet and she ****ing stinks!!"
    I said "there's no need to whisper dad she's deaf!...
     
    #8310
    kiwiqpr, Jan 27, 2020
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  12. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    The inventor of inappropriately timed innuendo jokes died yesterday.
    His wife is taking it hard.
     
    #8311
    kiwiqpr, Jan 27, 2020
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  13. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #8312
    kiwiqpr, Jan 27, 2020
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  14. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #8313
    kiwiqpr, Jan 27, 2020
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  15. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #8314
    kiwiqpr, Jan 27, 2020
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  16. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #8315
    kiwiqpr, Jan 27, 2020
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  17. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #8316
    kiwiqpr, Jan 27, 2020
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  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8317
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 27, 2020
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  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8318
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 27, 2020
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8319
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 27, 2020
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  21. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8320
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 27, 2020
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