Hugmuneh!

What's every cùnt up tae tonight. Any complete mongos bought over priced tickets to freeze their nuts off in Princes Street or Freedom square?

I'll be sitting in front of ma telly arguing with the missus because I want to watch Hootananny while she wants to watch cringeworthy BBC tartan clad buffoonery.

Standard tbf.

Bring in the bells and fùck off to bed in a bad mood probably.

Awe ra best when comes anyhoo.

Ya buncha cùnts.

 

Most overrated night of the year

Meal wae senga then boozer till closing time

WATP

 

Went to Tesco for booze and there was a **** ton reduced to clear. Probably going out of date. £10.10p for 24 bottles of Harp

Will not be setting my foot across the door.

 

Meant to be going to a party in my building. Can't be ****ed. hate New Year. will wonder down around 10ish and fuc k off home about 1 and smash on the choons.

 

I've the headphones in already mate, I'm not a fan of organised fun. Or double fare taxis tbphwy

 

Whit you got on. Currently have on Morrison Hotel.

 

Desire - Dylan. Most underrated album ever

 

stunning album.

 

That sounds a cheap way to get pissed but then so does a bottle of meths.
I'm drinking Hobgoblin Gold in cans and Oxford Landing Sauvignon Blanc. The beer being one of the only drinkable cans available in almost a pint (500ml) and the wine drinkable and just that bit less alcohol (10.5%) than standard. Not going out, bollox.

 

Hogmanay is ****.

Strictly for poofters and lezzers.

 

Hootananny is the Jules Holland thing right? As a kid I found New Years Eve the most boring telly of the year with the Andy Stewart Hogmanay thing on every channel. Joolz has the present day equivalent gig. No idea why New Year is associated with the scotch so much, it's New Year for everyone. Not that I give a fork. Bollox.

 

Right?

 

I dunno maybe it's my age but now I drink to get a bit pissed and also to savour the flavour.
Do you savour the flavour of Harp lager?

 

Do you still get Skol?

 

I believe its still available, another scotch invention.

 

Everything tastes the same after a few. I drink to get drunk, do you smell your beer before consuming?

 

I do. Sorry to be judge mental, each to their own. Watching Billy Eliot, makes me quite emotional. Got sent to ballet classes as a kid, refused to join in. Think of the cherries I could have popped if I'd have given it a chance.

 

Well ye obviously do give a fùck Nige.

The reason new year has been associated with Scotland is because Scotland knows how tae paaarrrrttteee.

Yoos cùnts are associated with ethnic cleansing, the raping of nations, genocide and Cricket.

Even though we took part in much of the above, we did it with a smile on our face and cheery attitude. Apart fae Cricket. We gave that a big body swerve

That's why the world looks upon us to bring in the new year.

And that why every cùnt hates yoos


Awe ra best mate

 

I think I understand, it's your annual "we are c@nts but not as much as them c@nts" day.