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Off Topic Jokes thread

Discussion in 'Portsmouth' started by devonFRATTONiser, Jan 25, 2015.

  1. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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  2. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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  3. antipodean exile

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  4. antipodean exile

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  5. antipodean exile

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  6. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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  7. antipodean exile

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  8. antipodean exile

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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    So the crocodile trainer unzipped and placed his manhood between the Croc jaws.He then banged the crocs head with a pint glass. The Croc snapped its jaw almost shut, leaving the trainers manhood intact. Audience clapped.The trainer asked if anyone else wanted to try. A little old lady shouted out "I will, but don't hit me so hard with that pint pot"
     
    #23830
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  11. antipodean exile

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  12. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a store.
    The store clerks called 000 when they saw him collapse to the floor.
    The paramedics rushed the man to the nearest hospital where he had emergency open-heart surgery.
    He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at the Catholic hospital.
    A nun was seated next to his bed holding a clipboard loaded with several forms and a pen.
    She asked him how he was going to pay for his treatment.
    “Do you have health insurance?” she asked.
    He replied in a raspy voice, “No health insurance.”
    The nun asked, “Do you have money in the bank?”
    He replied, “No money in the bank.”
    “Do you have a relative who could help you with the payments?” asked the irritated nun.
    He said, “I only have a spinster sister, and she is a nun.”
    The nun became agitated and announced loudly, “Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God.”
    “Perfect,” the Irishman replied. “Send the bill to my brother-in-law.”
     
    #23832
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  13. antipodean exile

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  14. antipodean exile

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  15. antipodean exile

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  16. antipodean exile

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  17. antipodean exile

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  18. antipodean exile

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  19. antipodean exile

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  20. antipodean exile

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