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Jokes

Discussion in 'Leeds United' started by ellandback, Jun 25, 2019.

Page 26 of 443
  1. Gessa

    Gessa Well-Known Member

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    A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat down next to a woman, and ordered a glass of champagne. The woman perks up and says, “How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!” “What a coincidence,” the farmer says, “This is a special day for me, I’m celebrating.” “This is a special day for me too, I’m also celebrating!” says the woman. “What a coincidence” says the man. As they clinked glasses the farmer asked, “What are you celebrating?” “My husband and I have been trying to have a child, and today my gynaecologist told me that I’m pregnant!” “What a coincidence…I’m a chicken farmer, and for years all my hens were infertile, but today they’re finally laying fertilized eggs.” said the farmer. “That’s great!” says the woman, “How did your chickens become fertile?” “I used a different cock,” he replied.
    The woman smiled and said, “WHAT A COINCIDENCE!”
     
    #501
    Gessa, Jun 19, 2020
    Eireleeds1, stonkin, Farsleyexile and 2 others like this.
  2. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    5E7EFBF1-7E43-4864-9C98-A34B1F40EDF3.jpeg
     
    #502
    Eireleeds1, Jun 20, 2020
    JonnyLosAngeles and Gessa like this.
  3. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    A6A3A78B-6238-4565-8AEA-40AE6A015429.jpeg
     
    #503
    Eireleeds1, Jun 22, 2020
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  4. JonnyLosAngeles

    JonnyLosAngeles Well-Known Member

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    LeedsLover!

    :emoticon-0102-bigsm:emoticon-0102-bigsm:emoticon-0102-bigsm:emoticon-0102-bigsm
     
    #504
    JonnyLosAngeles, Jun 23, 2020
    Gessa and stonkin like this.
  5. stonkin

    stonkin Well-Known Member

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    The sort you'd find in a Christmas cracker:grin:
     
    #505
    stonkin, Jun 23, 2020
    Gessa, Whitejock and JonnyLosAngeles like this.
  6. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    0B26AE84-E384-4A3F-AEB9-37613C960333.jpeg
     
    #506
    Eireleeds1, Jun 23, 2020
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  7. Old Git

    Old Git Well-Known Member

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    #507
    Old Git, Jun 23, 2020
  8. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    AF2C51B8-F60B-4D2F-9B02-C85251F5D6F1.jpeg
     
    #508
    Eireleeds1, Jun 24, 2020
    Farsleyexile, Gessa, Whitejock and 1 other person like this.
  9. Old Git

    Old Git Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #509
    Old Git, Jun 26, 2020
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  10. Gessa

    Gessa Well-Known Member

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    Dad: Son what do you want to be when you leve school?

    Son: either a pizza delivery boy or a plumber

    Dad: Stop watching porn son.
     
    #510
    Gessa, Jun 26, 2020
    Eireleeds1 and Farsleyexile like this.

  11. wakeybreakyheart

    wakeybreakyheart Well-Known Member

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    FB_IMG_1593262396024.jpg
     
    #511
    wakeybreakyheart, Jun 27, 2020
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  12. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    A0072F9D-0FF2-4F5C-959F-19B5EB3BA770.jpeg
     
    #512
    Eireleeds1, Jun 28, 2020
    Ringo Lion, Farsleyexile and Gessa like this.
  13. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    #513
    Eireleeds1, Jun 28, 2020
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  14. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    #514
    Eireleeds1, Jun 28, 2020
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  15. davy

    davy Well-Known Member

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    Man walks into a bar.....












    <laugh><laugh><laugh>
     
    #515
    davy, Jun 28, 2020
  16. Gessa

    Gessa Well-Known Member

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    Liverpool have won the league and the government are paying people not to work. Somewhere out there is a scouser with a lamp and a genie, and he's wondering what to do with his last wish.......
     
    #516
    Gessa, Jun 29, 2020
    lifecheshirewhite, Ringo Lion, Farsleyexile and 4 others like this.
  17. Ringo Lion

    Ringo Lion Pumpkin

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    I went to one of those faith healers the other day!!
    What a load of rubbish, even the bloke in the wheelchair next to me stood up and walked out!!
     
    #517
    Ringo Lion, Jun 30, 2020
    Gessa, Farsleyexile, brisbane-lion and 2 others like this.
  18. Whitejock

    Whitejock Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #518
    Whitejock, Jul 1, 2020
    Farsleyexile and Eireleeds1 like this.
  19. Eireleeds1

    Eireleeds1 Well-Known Member

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    #519
    Eireleeds1, Jul 1, 2020
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  20. brisbane-lion

    brisbane-lion Well-Known Member

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    Good one, Eire.
     
    #520
    brisbane-lion, Jul 2, 2020
    Eireleeds1 likes this.
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