1. Log in now to remove adverts - no adverts at all to registered members!

Off Topic Phone Scam

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Dorty Dogbreath, May 22, 2020.

Page 3 of 4
  1. Ghostinthehouse

    Ghostinthehouse Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2017
    Messages:
    520
    Likes Received:
    476
    Who, Dorty, you or me?
     
    #41
    Ghostinthehouse, May 22, 2020
  2. haslam

    haslam Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 29, 2011
    Messages:
    10,913
    Likes Received:
    10,939
    Both of you, no half measures.

    Go balls deep.
     
    #42
    haslam, May 22, 2020
  3. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2011
    Messages:
    72,430
    Likes Received:
    37,846
    I often get mistaken for Ray Donovan. True story. Dunno if it’s the suit or my temper.
     
    #43
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 22, 2020
    Ghostinthehouse and brb like this.
  4. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2011
    Messages:
    72,430
    Likes Received:
    37,846
    I also have a baseball bat pepper mill which stays in the kitchen and a bat in my office along with a mitt and a baseball so I can demonstrate I was gonna go for a game at the park when I accidentally defended myself by smashing some scroats swede in.
     
    #44
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 22, 2020
    Dorty Dogbreath and Ghostinthehouse like this.
  5. Ghostinthehouse

    Ghostinthehouse Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2017
    Messages:
    520
    Likes Received:
    476
    You sound like you've got first hand experience.
    Remember to take the tablets tonight.
     
    #45
    Ghostinthehouse, May 22, 2020
    haslam and Dorty Dogbreath like this.
  6. Ghostinthehouse

    Ghostinthehouse Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2017
    Messages:
    520
    Likes Received:
    476
    A bit on the light side for Consett.
    Don't you think a machete would be more appropriate?
     
    #46
    Ghostinthehouse, May 22, 2020
  7. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2011
    Messages:
    72,430
    Likes Received:
    37,846
    Edged weapons are for the cockneys who can’t use their fists or blunt instruments.

    a bat is easier to grip with my six digits too.
     
    #47
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 22, 2020
    Ghostinthehouse likes this.
  8. Ghostinthehouse

    Ghostinthehouse Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2017
    Messages:
    520
    Likes Received:
    476
    Aye, I noticed how hard it was to prise a glass out of your hand. <laugh>
     
    #48
    Ghostinthehouse, May 22, 2020
    Albert's Chip Shop, JakartaToon and GeordieHalfbreed like this.
  9. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2011
    Messages:
    11,530
    Likes Received:
    11,832
    I've been scammed a couple of times.
    Someone used my credit card to purchase an expensive camera in Dubai. Never been to Dubai, **** knows how they did it.
    Second one someone set up a direct debit for a phone contract for 60 quid a month from one of my savings accounts. They took 11 payments before I noticed. Couldn't figure this one out either, I assumed it was an employee of the bank.
    Got my money back on both occasions.
     
    #49
    Schlem Boogerman, May 22, 2020
    Ghostinthehouse and Dorty Dogbreath like this.
  10. cronemeister

    cronemeister Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2011
    Messages:
    6,390
    Likes Received:
    6,834
    You still alive dorts or you been banged up?
     
    #50
    cronemeister, May 22, 2020
    Dorty Dogbreath likes this.

  11. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    May 1, 2011
    Messages:
    27,879
    Likes Received:
    22,825
    If he’s not careful he’s going to get banged up.
     
    #51
    Delusional Full Stop, May 22, 2020
    Dorty Dogbreath and Ghostinthehouse like this.
  12. GeordieHalfbreed

    GeordieHalfbreed Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 2, 2013
    Messages:
    2,067
    Likes Received:
    2,345
    The trick is to say the magic words out loud:

    “Mai Rown Dwa Tchu Ha Ving”
     
    #52
    GeordieHalfbreed, May 22, 2020
    Dorty Dogbreath, Ghostinthehouse and Albert's Chip Shop like this.
  13. JakartaToon

    JakartaToon Well-Known Member
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    May 1, 2014
    Messages:
    15,642
    Likes Received:
    18,336
    nigeria.jpg
     
    #53
    JakartaToon, May 22, 2020
    Libby, RobEllious, Schlem Boogerman and 4 others like this.
  14. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2011
    Messages:
    72,430
    Likes Received:
    37,846
    mot the wallet out of my pocket :)
     
    #54
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 22, 2020
    Ghostinthehouse likes this.
  15. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2011
    Messages:
    17,461
    Likes Received:
    9,017
    <laugh>
     
    #55
    Dorty Dogbreath, May 22, 2020
  16. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2011
    Messages:
    17,461
    Likes Received:
    9,017
    **** it, the fake delivery man didnt turn up so I played golf anyway. Shot 74 in a gale. I just imagined the ****'s face on the ball and smashed it fifty yards further than normal. Or was that wind causing that?
     
    #56
    Dorty Dogbreath, May 22, 2020
    cronemeister, Schlem Boogerman, Ghostinthehouse and 1 other person like this.
  17. Ghostinthehouse

    Ghostinthehouse Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2017
    Messages:
    520
    Likes Received:
    476
    I'm just guessing, but, I suspect it might have been the farting...<laugh>
     
    #57
    Ghostinthehouse, May 22, 2020
  18. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    May 1, 2011
    Messages:
    27,879
    Likes Received:
    22,825
    Dorty earlier today when phone delivery boy turns up

     
    #58
    Delusional Full Stop, May 22, 2020
    Dorty Dogbreath likes this.
  19. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2011
    Messages:
    17,461
    Likes Received:
    9,017
    <laugh>
     
    #59
    Dorty Dogbreath, May 22, 2020
  20. Darren Peacock’s Ponytail

    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2011
    Messages:
    31,081
    Likes Received:
    20,634
    If I was the fraudster I would come the next day.

    You've received the phone, you contact the phone company and arrange to have it collected at the the phone companies expense.

    I then pop by saying I understand you've a parcel for collection.
     
    #60
    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail, May 23, 2020
    Dorty Dogbreath likes this.
Page 3 of 4

Share This Page