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The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

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  1. Didley Squat

    Didley Squat Well-Known Member

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    Should be listed on the ‘Nothing’ thread.
     
    #2481
    Didley Squat, Oct 16, 2017
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2482
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 16, 2017
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2483
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 16, 2017
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  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    BREAKING NEWS: Irish Government Gathering Essential Supplies Ahead Of Hurricane Ophelia.

    please log in to view this image
     
    #2484
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 16, 2017
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  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:

    Indubitably

    Innovative

    Preliminary

    Proliferation

    Cinnamon

    THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:

    Specificity

    British Constitution

    Passive-aggressive disorder

    Loquacious Transubstantiate

    THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:

    Thanks, but I don't want to have sex

    Nope, no more booze for me

    Sorry, but you're not really my type

    Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight
     
    #2485
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 16, 2017
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Q: What's the difference between a fat chick and a Liverpool striker?

    A: Even a fat chick scores every once in a while!
     
    #2486
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 16, 2017
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2487
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 16, 2017
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2488
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 17, 2017
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2489
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 17, 2017
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  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2490
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 17, 2017
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided if cowboy architects had just made their towns big enough for everyone.
     
    #2491
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 17, 2017
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  12. Didley Squat

    Didley Squat Well-Known Member

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    Are you calling me Cancade?
    Why you dirty varmint!
     
    #2492
    Didley Squat, Oct 17, 2017
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  13. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    A man walks into a bar and orders a drink.
    Suddenly he hears someone say, "Hey, nice face!" The man looks up to try to find out who said it, but no one was around.
    "Hey! Nice arse!" The man looks up again, but there's nobody there.
    "Hey! big muscles!" The man then calls the bartender over and asks him if he keeps talking to him.
    The bartender replies, "It's not me;
    it must be the nuts
    they're complimentary."
     
    #2493
    kiwiqpr, Oct 18, 2017
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  14. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    Tail of mouse
    Eye of cat
    Head of newt
    and wing of bat.


    Not Halloween, a list of reasons why the council closed our KFC.
     
    #2494
    kiwiqpr, Oct 18, 2017
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  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2495
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 18, 2017
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  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2496
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 18, 2017
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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2497
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 18, 2017
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  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    • There is a new girls' doll out on the market.

    • It comes with no shoes, no clothes, no house, no car and no farm.It's called Zim-barbie.
     
    #2498
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 18, 2017
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  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    • Britain and America have always had this special relationship.

    • The special relationship being that neither of us could be arsed to learn French.
     
    #2499
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 18, 2017
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Why is business so hard. I'm closing my restaurant this week. I've advertised on the TV, radio, newspapers and even sent out fliers with no success.

    It's called ''the G spot''. Nice food, lovely restaurant and good prices. Everyone has heard about it but no one can find it.
     
    #2500
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 18, 2017
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Page 125 of 746
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

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