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What would you want on your gravestone?

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Albert's Chip Shop, May 31, 2020.

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  1. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    Apart from details etc of your name etc.

    I’d probs want written... with limited capital letters and a few typos:

    Gave Zero ****s
    Loved his family and friends
    Always did what HE wanted in HIS way.
     
    #1
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 31, 2020
  2. Charlie Dogscock

    Charlie Dogscock Well-Known Member

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    Dunno, something that stands out, one of the following maybe:

    - Piss Off You Sad Twat And Do Something More Interesting That Look At People's ****ing Gravestones
    - If You're Looking At This You Gay
    - My Tombstone Is Better Than Yours
    - I'm Still Alive Please Dig Me Up!
    - He Lies An All Round ****
     
    #2
    Charlie Dogscock, May 31, 2020
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  3. GeordieHalfbreed

    GeordieHalfbreed Well-Known Member

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    Given engravers charge by the letter, wouldn’t just “Selfish C***” be cheaper?
     
    #3
    GeordieHalfbreed, May 31, 2020
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  4. Ben 10

    Ben 10 Well-Known Member

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    Still waiting for the takeover to go through
     
    #4
    Ben 10, May 31, 2020
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  5. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    **** would be even cheaper.
     
    #5
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 31, 2020
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  6. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    Chippy said “It’s my round!!!”
     
    #6
    Delusional Full Stop, May 31, 2020
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  7. Ghostinthehouse

    Ghostinthehouse Well-Known Member

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    It's not what you want, it's what you get.

    Best be kind to the other half or you are ****ed.<laugh>
     
    #7
    Ghostinthehouse, May 31, 2020
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  8. Hung Drawn and Quartered

    Hung Drawn and Quartered Well-Known Member

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    Goes by size of font also
    Would you like a quote <laugh>
     
    #8
    Hung Drawn and Quartered, May 31, 2020
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  9. Hung Drawn and Quartered

    Hung Drawn and Quartered Well-Known Member

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    And that's what done you in
     
    #9
    Hung Drawn and Quartered, May 31, 2020
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  10. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    T
     
    #10
    Delusional Full Stop, May 31, 2020
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  11. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    now the letter T on its own would be canny cheap.
     
    #11
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 31, 2020
  12. Ghostinthehouse

    Ghostinthehouse Well-Known Member

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    Cheapskates
     
    #12
    Ghostinthehouse, May 31, 2020
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  13. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    T
     
    #13
    Delusional Full Stop, May 31, 2020
  14. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    T
     
    #14
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 31, 2020
  15. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    t
     
    #15
    Delusional Full Stop, May 31, 2020
  16. Judge Death

    Judge Death Well-Known Member

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    Nick Spike Milligan's - "Told you I was ill"
     
    #16
    Judge Death, May 31, 2020
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  17. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    " Here lies Jim, he will be missed. He's got the cans in his grave so he'll still get p!ssed "
     
    #17
    jimileysbaldhead, May 31, 2020
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  18. Sheikh_of_Araby

    Sheikh_of_Araby Well-Known Member

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    Cremated and ashes scattered.
     
    #18
    Sheikh_of_Araby, Jun 1, 2020
  19. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    Hic jacet...Dorty Mag...mackem hater <laugh>
     
    #19
    Dorty Dogbreath, Jun 1, 2020
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  20. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    Don't turn round
    I'm behind you!
     
    #20
    Joelinton's Right Foot, Jun 1, 2020
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