Off Topic Albanian Barbers

Over the years I have had my now sadly thinning barnet thatched by a succession of mostly Eye-ties or Bubbles, as seems to be the tradition in my part of the world. More recently there seems to have been an influx of Poles, Serbs, Hungarians and watnot skilled in the art of the stylish tonsure.

Today the chap charged with grooming my elegant bonce was Albanian. Hardly spoke a word of English, but he did ask me when I went to pay, if I was a senior citizen; I do not know the Albanian for "not ****ing yet you cheeky ****".

Anyway, a lack of English was no hinderance, and yer man did rather a pukka job I thought. I don't have a lot to work with these days in the Barnet dept, but young Bogdan soon had me looking like a Roman general posing for a marble bust, before sacking Carthage. A job well done, in other words.

Now my question in this Brexit era is this; should I be looking for a brain dead workshy proud English racist to trim the old bonce in future? Any chance of @DUNCAN DONUTS , @brb , @HRH Custard VC , or any other 'Leave' voting inbred mongs, getting trained up as barbers, in the spirit of British jobs for British loaves?

Asking for a friend.

 

Just use veet.

 

All the Albanians I come across drive around dropping off drugs. Another useful skill that the lazy English can't be bothered to do

 

Cant cut hair I dont own an MX5

Why dont you cut your own hair?

 

Bloody foreigners. Coming here and replacing all our English drug dealers.

 

Albanians have the drug market on lock down in a lot of towns these days - fair play to them.

20 years ago it was the yardies.

We have a Turkish Barber shop here and they seem popular, I don't go there as my hairdresser is fit and does an excellent job. But if I wanted a wet shave or similar the Turks would be my place to go. They got some mad equipment in there for shaving etc.

 

Thought about getting some clippers and doing this. But what if I missed a patch at the back, about the size of a 50p bit? No one would ****ing tell me.

 

Mirror

 

Turkish barbers are the go-to guys for exceptionally hairy ****ers. Bloke I used to work with went to one to get his ears done occasionally

 

Yeah the Eastern Europeans run things in Soton now, for weed n coke at least.

 

It’s easy to cut your own hair if you adopt the National Front’s preferred hairstyle.

 

Best barber I’ve been to was Turkish. Some place near Farringdon.

 

They're all English in my barbers. I get mine done by a hipster... he is good at his job but I'd hate to see his food cupboard, it'd look like @PISKIE's wet dream.

 

Hahahaha, ****ing crying here

 

Do you cut your own hair?

 

I went to one once with my auld fella in Turkey, they asked him if he wanted his ears doing and then used the flame technique, it was like being in a ****ing forest fire

 

He hasn’t got any hair.

 

I was picturing an entire family with bowl cuts.

 

Most intense haircut and wet shave I had was at a Hammam in Morocco. Start off with a haircut and a shave and then it’s basically strip down to your undercrackers and some **** off hairy ****er slaps you around a bit on a tiled floor. It’s like a really intense massage crossed with getting beaten up.

Never forget seeing my mate next to me lying on his front with his legs being bent back behind his head by this gorilla of a man, screaming in pain and slapping the floor like a wrestler throwing in the towel

 

So was I, like a scene from Deliverance.