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Off Topic Burglar

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Albert's Chip Shop, May 30, 2020.

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  1. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    Seen this on Facebook...

    ED5C7583-A18A-4B38-8E23-F1221C6A28FC.jpeg

    I’d take the bog roll from beside someone’s bog... and the toothpaste from their bathroom.
     
    #1
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 30, 2020
  2. Darren Peacock’s Ponytail

    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail Well-Known Member

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    Batteries from everything

    Light bulbs
     
    #2
    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail, May 30, 2020
  3. Maximin Effort

    Maximin Effort Well-Known Member

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    Curtains
     
    #3
    Maximin Effort, May 30, 2020
    GeordieHalfbreed likes this.
  4. Ghostinthehouse

    Ghostinthehouse Well-Known Member

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    Sound's like some weird Consett fantasy trip....<laugh>
     
    #4
    Ghostinthehouse, May 30, 2020
    Albert's Chip Shop likes this.
  5. Prince Isak (GG)

    Prince Isak (GG) Well-Known Member

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    Souls!

    identity!

    Medications!

    Have I missed the point here? I’m a kind of take everything **** everyone kind of guy!
     
    #5
    Prince Isak (GG), May 30, 2020
  6. cronemeister

    cronemeister Well-Known Member

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    Every single iphone/ipad charger and lead I could find.
     
    #6
    cronemeister, May 30, 2020
    GeordieHalfbreed and Albert's Chip Shop like this.
  7. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    evil twat
     
    #7
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 30, 2020
  8. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    The convenience.
     
    #8
    Delusional Full Stop, May 30, 2020
  9. Sucky

    Sucky peoples champ & forum saviour

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    Underwear and socks
     
    #9
    Sucky, May 30, 2020
  10. Darren Peacock’s Ponytail

    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail Well-Known Member

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    Trust a scouser to put an answer
     
    #10
    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail, May 30, 2020

  11. Sucky

    Sucky peoples champ & forum saviour

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    Im not a scouser <laugh>
     
    #11
    Sucky, May 30, 2020
  12. Darren Peacock’s Ponytail

    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail Well-Known Member

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    Ah a glory hunter
     
    #12
    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail, May 30, 2020
    JakartaToon likes this.
  13. E.T. Fairfax

    E.T. Fairfax Well-Known Member

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    Door knobs
     
    #13
    E.T. Fairfax, May 30, 2020
    Albert's Chip Shop likes this.
  14. Sheikh_of_Araby

    Sheikh_of_Araby Well-Known Member

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    Front, backdoor, window keys. Lock them all from the outside. Mobile phones and laptops too. Tie them up before leaving. Let's see them call for help.
     
    #14
    Sheikh_of_Araby, May 30, 2020
  15. haslam

    haslam Well-Known Member

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    Contraception.

    The plan would be to do it so subtly they don't notice until they want to use it but I admit if they use a coil she's probably going to notice me taking it.
     
    #15
    haslam, May 30, 2020
    GeordieHalfbreed and Sheikh_of_Araby like this.
  16. Sucky

    Sucky peoples champ & forum saviour

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    Nah just plastic
     
    #16
    Sucky, May 30, 2020
    Flash likes this.
  17. haslam

    haslam Well-Known Member

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    He's from Liverpool but he's not a scouser as he doesn't thieve and rob.
     
    #17
    haslam, May 30, 2020
    Flash likes this.
  18. Darren Peacock’s Ponytail

    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail Well-Known Member

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    You'll be eating prawn sandwiches soon like Tel
     
    #18
    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail, May 30, 2020
  19. AgentofAlnwick

    AgentofAlnwick Well-Known Member

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    Burgle their bottoms. Assuming it's their first time, you're stealing their anal virginity.
     
    #19
    AgentofAlnwick, May 30, 2020
  20. Darren Peacock’s Ponytail

    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail Well-Known Member

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    Bit like a surprise polling eh @haslam
     
    #20
    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail, May 30, 2020
    haslam likes this.
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