Not only do I have splinters in my arse, after the last result I fell off the fence and drowned in my own tears. I am now a merman. I think I'm a merman. Hold on, where's my dick? Bollocks! Heh, where's my bollocks? I think I'm a mermaid. I'm a ****ing mermaid. What have you done Waddock & Co? You have to win the next game to reverse this catastrophe. Help. I can't lose faith now. If you don't win the next game, I'll get you for this you bastard.
PS. The effects of following a team through thick and thin, and eventually very runny, into senility.