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JACK-ANORY FOR A FUNNY STORY - Joke Thread & Comedy Club

Discussion in 'Swansea City' started by swimaway, Jun 18, 2011.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I started doing some impressions of old TV detectives in the pub last night.
    Telly Savalas aka Kojak, “Who loves ya baby?”
    Peter Falk aka Colombo, "Just one more thing.”
    Humphrey Bogart, “Play it again Sam.”
    After a couple of others I noticed a young lady taking a lot of interest and asked her, “Would you like to see my Dick Tracy?”
    She said, “Yes please, but my names not Tracy!”
     
    #17481
    Wooperts_duck, May 16, 2024
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I was watching Countdown earlier, Rachel Riley was in a very short skirt.
    I got aroused.
    Only seven letters, but not bad for a first attempt.
     
    #17482
    Wooperts_duck, May 16, 2024
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17483
    Wooperts_duck, May 16, 2024
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  4. swantastic

    swantastic Well-Known Member

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    #17484
    swantastic, May 17, 2024
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  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17485
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17486
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17487
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17488
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17489
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17490
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17491
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17492
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17493
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    After a 2 year study, the National Science Foundation announced the following results on the Men's recreational preferences:
    1. The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is: basketball
    2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is: bowling.
    3. The sport of choice for blue-collar workers is: football.
    4. The sport of choice for supervisors is: baseball.
    5. The sport of choice for middle management is: tennis.
    6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is: golf.
    Conclusion: The higher you rise in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become
     
    #17494
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17495
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Someone shouted BNAG at me in the street!

    That's bang out of order....
     
    #17496
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17497
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17498
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #17499
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I said to my wife "When I die," I'd like to die having sex"

    She replied "At least we know it'll be quick"
     
    #17500
    Wooperts_duck, May 17, 2024
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