Off Topic Mental Health Discussion Thread

Sorry to hear that.

I think Ron's advice to contact Relate is a very good one.

Don't be worried about sharing things on here as they develop though. The fact we're mostly strangers might help and there will definitely be people on here who have experience of it

 

The doctors have now confirmed that they can't do anything.
She's battled for almost 10 months, regular chemo therapy, good rehab progress, sudden setbacks, signs of things looking up and now the final judgement.
"We're talking months. It has spread to the lungs, we can't give her the doses needed, she wouldn't survive that. It's all about helping her with the pain now"

She hasn't complained once during these 10 months, been more worried about if I eat enough, offered her supplement drinks to me, worried that I don't drink enough.
Her short term memory has gone. The doctors gave the the final assessment of her situation and she naturally got very upset, but she has since forgotten about it.
I've spent the day with her today in her new apartment at an elderly home. It does break me when she starts talking about whether she should buy some new furtniture for the future.

I can tell how weak she is. She can't do anything herself, but she tries.
A couple of years she was in as good shape as you can expect for someone her age (early 60s). She wouldn't have survived for this long if it wasn't for her physical and mental strength, but it's basically a shell remaining.

Some days I feel fine (as fine as you can feel in this situation). Other days I have minor breakdowns at work.
The trips back home (3 hours one way currently) are the worst. I try to not worry her during the visit, but my mind gets going on the way home.
I'll be happy if I have 10 % of her strength in the future. Couldn't ask for a better role model

 

You have her bravery more than you'll ever know

Keep posting here

All with you as much we can be

 

So sorry to hear that Febbos
She sounds like an amazing lady, still looking out for you whatever life throws at her.
It won’t be easy, it simply can’t be, but I hope her pain is managed well and she is as comfortable as she can be.
It’s entirely normal to break down occasionally. You can’t deal with this situation affecting someone you love so much without breaking down.
Keep looking after yourself and keep talking though. You’ll know she’d want that.
If you want to scream at the world then this is a fairly good place to do it I’d say.
Take care

 

So sorry to hear this. My mum has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer that has spread to her liver. She was offered chemotherapy but it made her ill so she'd rather 'enjoy' her limited time left. She's been told the average is 4 to 6 months from diagnosis and we're coming up to 4 months now. I can totally sympathise with how you're feeling at the moment. Stay strong brother.

 

Stay strong yourself too Paul.
Horrible situation but there are definitely people here for you if you need to vent or just talk without judgement

 

I've no words that can help but I agree with Den - if you need to say anything there's people here who will listen.


That's a beautiful photo by the way.


As some poet once said, "What will survive of us is Love".

 

Look after yourself mate and stay strong.



That's a brave choice your Mum's made.

 

I’m sorry Febbos. The rollercoaster of emotions that you’re experiencing is completely normal, take one day at a time and we’re here for you if you need us.

Like Paul Jewitt I understand where you are. My mam is declining too. In her case she’s “lucky” as It’s normal old age stuff but it’s scary to see how fast this capable, strong woman has ended up lying in her bed, shrunk to nothing, faculties flitting in and out. One moment bollocking me, the next moment asking why my brothers been out all night and what am I making him for tea.

 

That's awful man, but she sounds like an amazing woman and it seems her qualities have continued through you. If you're struggling, feel free to DM me if you need somebody to talk to.

 

sorry to hear, it’s tough, real tough, but you’re tougher.

 

Bless you mate. Like you say your mum is a true role model in every way. You too are a top top son.

Take care of yourself too. Always here.

 

Some heart wrenching posts on here...

Thinking of all concerned,Ric xxxx

 

Little evidence that chemical imbalance causes depression, UCL scientists find
Researchers question use of antidepressants, prescribed to one in six UK adults

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Andrew Gregory Health editor
Scientists have called into question the widespread use of antidepressants after a major review found “no clear evidence” that low serotonin levels are responsible for depression.

Prescriptions for antidepressants have risen dramatically since the 1990s, with one in six adults and 2% of teenagers in England now being prescribed them. Millions more people around the world regularly use antidepressants.

“Many people take antidepressants because they have been led to believe their depression has a biochemical cause, but this new research suggests this belief is not grounded in evidence,” said the study’s lead author, Joanna Moncrieff, a professor of psychiatry at University College London and consultant psychiatrist at North East London NHSfoundation trust.

“It is always difficult to prove a negative, but I think we can safely say that after a vast amount of research conducted over several decades, there is no convincing evidence that depression is caused by serotonin abnormalities, particularly by lower levels or reduced activity of serotonin.

NHS to give therapy for depression before medication under new guidelines
“Thousands of people suffer from side-effects of antidepressants, including the severe withdrawal effects that can occur when people try to stop them, yet prescription rates continue to rise. We believe this situation has been driven partly by the false belief that depression is due to a chemical imbalance. It is high time to inform the public that this belief is not grounded in science.”

The new review of existing studies found that depression is not likely to be caused by a chemical imbalance and said people should be made aware of other options for treating it.

However, other experts, including from the Royal College of Psychiatrists, questioned the findings and urged people not to stop taking their medication in light of the study, arguing that antidepressants remained effective.

In the new analysis, researchers said 85% to 90% of the public believed depression was caused by low serotonin or a chemical imbalance.

Most antidepressants are selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), originally said to work by correcting abnormally low serotonin levels.

The review, published in the journal Molecular Psychiatry, looked at studies examining serotonin and depression involving tens of thousands of people. One of the findings was that research comparing levels of serotonin and its breakdown products in the blood or brain fluids did not discover any difference between people diagnosed with depression and healthy people.

The authors also looked at studies where serotonin levels were artificially lowered in hundreds of people and concluded that lowering serotonin in this way did not produce depression in hundreds of healthy volunteers.

My teenage Prozac diary
Other studies looked at the effects of stressful life events and found that the more stressful life events a person had experienced, the more likely they were to be depressed, showing the importance of external events.

According to the research, there is also evidence from other studies that antidepressants may actually induce low serotonin in the long term.

“Our view is that patients should not be told that depression is caused by low serotonin or by a chemical imbalance, and they should not be led to believe that antidepressants work by targeting these unproven abnormalities,” said Moncrieff.

“We do not understand what antidepressants are doing to the brain exactly, and giving people this sort of misinformation prevents them from making an informed decision about whether to take antidepressants or not.”

A spokesperson for the Royal College of Psychiatrists said: “Antidepressants are an effective, Nice-recommended treatment for depression that can also be prescribed for a range of physical and mental health conditions. We would not recommend for anyone to stop taking their antidepressants based on this review, and encourage anyone with concerns about their medication to contact their GP.”

Dr Michael Bloomfield, a consultant psychiatrist and principal clinical research fellow at University College London, who was not involved in the study, said: “Many of us know that taking paracetamol can be helpful for headaches, and I don’t think anyone believes that headaches are caused by not enough paracetamol in the brain. The same logic applies to depression and medicines used to treat depression.

“There is consistent evidence that antidepressant medicines can be helpful in the treatment of depression and can be life-saving.”

 

Just sending you my love, Febbos x

 

Reaching out to Paul and Febbos. Really sorry to hear your sad news. My mum passed in similar circumstances. She had bowel cancer and we had a few months of knowing she was terminally ill. From my experience I think it,is important to just treasure the time you both have with your mums now.. you both seem to be.

 

An interesting. if not long response

https://www.rollingstone.com/cultur...ght-wing-attack-joanna-moncrieff-1388067/amp/

 

Thanks for all kind words
I've not been great at replying, but appreciate them all, both on here and PMs.

Mom lost her battle on August 1 with the family near. She passed away in the middle of the night, seemingly painless.

Feel shattered both emotionally and physically, can't sleep more than 1-2 hours, been like that 6-7 days now.
But she stayed strong all the way through, stronger than I could ever imagine being myself.

She raised me and my sister on her own and her mindset to put others ahead of herself was always there.
She was in terrible pain a little while ago and she said it'd be nice to lay on the side instead of her back.
I saud she should call for the nurses with her alarm.

"No, no, I should be alright until tomorrow. I don't want to bother them with more things".



I got a notification on my phone a couple of days ago.
It reminded me that it was 1 year ago a picture was taken. One year ago it was all normal.

1956-2022

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Condolences, mate. She lives on in you and your sister.

 

So sorry on your loss mate